Stress!

We all know what the word is, and most think they know how it feels. 

     Recently I've had so much going on in my life, worry troubles, finding a job, house problems. A lot has been thrown on my plate at one time. 

    I have been through quite a lot in my life, my mother passed away when I was very young and soon after I sadly lost my grandad and last year my nan had a tough struggle with cancer, and she ended up passing away in October. 

    The point im trying to make is, ive been through a lot but I'm generally normally a very happy person. I normally always have a smile on my face, and these last few months things have gone from bad to worse. I do worry a lot anyway, but now I feel like I'm alone in the world and everything is left to me to sort. I can't sleep at night and then eventually when I do sleep, I think to myself what do I have to get up for? I've been very sad worrying about everything! 

     It's the worst feeling in the world, everything in your past basically runs after you when your down and helps drag you down further. But I will not be beaten! I know there are people a lot worse of then me in this world. But I feel alone. Like no one cares or wants to help. ( maybe I'm feeling sorry for myself) but its how stress/depression catches up to you. 

I know today's post has even a lot different but I thought it might help me writing it thinking it getting it out. 

Thank you for reading!